I've got an excuse for being distracted this time.
I've been asked to move.
Short version: My cousin is an Asshole.
I've been living in my Grandmother's house since she moved to a retirement community three years ago. My cousin moved into a house around the block around Thanksgiving. In that time I've seen him twice. . . Both times when he wanted something. The house he rented is owned by someone we've all known since we were kids. Someone who has always been a Grand Flake. So "Flake" decided that she was going to move in with her boyfriend and offered to rent her house to "Cousin Asshat" since his "family" (his girlfriend and her three kids) were living in a house that was too small, and they didn't like the school district. Personally knowing Flake, I would have gotten a rental contract or lease in the first place. But CA didn't and in February Flake decided that she wanted to move back into her home. Surprise. (not really)
Why do I care?
When CA was little his Mother moved them back in with Grandma, hopped on the welfare wagon and left the majority of the child-rearing to her. So Grandma really sees him more like a son than a grandson. So when he found out that Flake was kicking them to the curb he started harassing Grandma about how much he misses his childhood home, and LOOK at how I'm letting it fall to pieces, and she's lived there soooo long and is just too lazy to get her own place.
Firstly, the house is in better condition than when I got there. I work full time, and my days off are split. So unless there is a holiday I don't get two days off from work in a row. Despite kicking my husband to the curb a few months after I moved there, I've still managed to get holes in the wall repaired, painting done, installed a dishwasher, brought the front yard under control (and had the back well on it's way), cleaned 40 years worth of crap out of the house and garage, and spent hundreds of dollars on trips to the dump and donation centers. During the course of some of these jobs I've discovered issues that are more than one-day jobs. Two rooms had drywall issues covered by wallpaper that are going to mean either extensive patching or outright replacement before anything else can be done. The fence that divides the backyard was not installed correctly and is (surprise) falling down. The dryer does not have a direct vent going to the outside of the house. The galvanized pipes are corroded and should have been replaced years ago, so while the water pressure going in the house is great, good luck with a shower. There are always mice in the cupboards and I don't even want to speculate on whether there is mold in the walls.
Second, I don't want to be living there. It's a POS and if I had the money I'd be happy to leave. I miss being able to call a land But I barely earn enough for a studio apartment in a bad neighborhood. So being Lazy isn't it. CA on the other hand earns more than I do and his girlfriend gets Alimony and Child Support from her Ex. Why can't they find another place to live then? Why does the person with no money and children who are actually biologically related get told that they need to move? Almost forgot, my brother has lived with me since my ex left, and he's unemployed. Yup, that's one more person who I feed and pay for that is getting kicked out because of this.
Tell me it doesn't just scream "favoritism" no matter which way you turn it.
So I'm furious, stressed, scared, upset, and a hundred other things. It's possible that my boss might give me a raise to help, but business has been so bad I don't feel good about it. I'll take it, but it's not the way I wanted to get a raise, by any means.
Part of me just wants to go out and find someplace new RIGHTNOW because I don't like not knowing where I'm going to go. I don't like leaving on a trip without knowing which hotel I'm headed toward. Unsettled is a bad feeling, and I hate it. But on the other hand I should be saving money for the move and getting myself prepared. And today I thought of the kicker. I need to get my divorce filed before I move.
Why haven't I already filed?
I could give you a bunch of reasons, but I won't. In this, I'm being lazy. Yes the Ex said he'd do it, but he didn't. (No Surprise) I'm just hoping magic divorce fairies will appear and grant my wishes to be legally un-hitched from this ball-and-chain. If I move it's more than likely going to back to the city where I grew up/work etc. But it's a different county which complicates things. So I made an appointment with a firm that helps you file your own stuff if you're in an uncontested case and skip actually hiring an attorney. Which as long as I don't get greedy this is. Keeping amicable with an abusive ex sucks, but he knows I'll be kinder than any judge so we're playing nice for everyone's sake. Maybe I'll become the Bitch Ex from Hell later. But now I just want him out of my life as much as possible.
The fact that I need to do it before my move should work to my advantage though. I think as long as I don't change counties till after I'm filed I should be good. . .but that means that I'm not moving till that first court date. Sorry CA, gotta fulfill legal obligations before I go. I'm also leaving that last load and a half that should go to the dump in the garage. It'll be your problem to deal with.
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